I’m not ready for school

1.

Dear Diary,

To be completely honest, I think the idea of ever going back to school was canceled out in my head a long time ago.

See, from where I stand, school isn’t a necessity anymore. I know realistically, we’ll all end up going back someday, even if it’s not in September, but I don’t think I’m ready. Since this whole quarantine thing began, a huge weight has been lifted off my shoulders. There was no more going to bed on time and getting up extra early, I didn’t have to worry about what I was going to wear the next day, or if I’d be late to class. Everything was smooth.

If we end up going back to school earlier than expected, it will be a struggle to acclimate. I mean, I haven’t physically gone to school in almost six months, and on top of that, everything is going to be different. We’ll all have to wear masks, classes will be smaller, the school dynamic is going to change drastically in terms of socializing, and there will be no extracurricular activities because of social distancing. Basically, everything that used to make school fun is going to be gone.

I think throughout this whole process, I’ve gone through multiple phases. At first, I was low-key excited about quarantining because it meant I didn’t have to go to school. As we got to the middle, I hated quarantine. On top of the constant fear that I might have somehow contracted the coronavirus, I was bored out of my mind. Even though we’re kind of in limbo about whether or not everything will return to normal, I realized that, though quarantine wasn’t the most ideal experience, it definitely taught me some things about being able to adapt to change and making the best out of a situation.

At the end of the day, if I really do have to go back to school in September, I know one thing. I’m not ready, not at all.