We live in a society where everything has to move fast and quickly, with little room for pause. You always have to be on your feet, always moving, always prepared for the next thing, whether it be rushing to your new job in the big city or preparing for the road to college, there’s seldom a moment of peace. And I don’t think that’s talked about enough today. I think the core of this mentality lies in America itself – what it was founded on, its success, and what it means today.
America was founded as a place of refuge, a place of liberty, and place of freedom, and from that, we honed in these ideas of the individual: a unique concept for a unique nation. Today, that has left us with, despite its faults, a thriving, multicultural, incredible society with a structure that has proved to work. America is the land of opportunity, where you can come and redefine your life and work to make yourself better- but it is also a first come, first serve nation.
We are still rapidly growing, in terms of technology and in terms of population, as our cities continue to expand at rapid speeds and technological innovations come almost daily. And for a time, the idea of what became known as The American Dream, really did work. My Nana’s side of the family had to completely build themselves up from next-to-nothing. My great grandma was a poor woman who lived on her own in Boston, and my great grandfather married her after the 2nd World War, immigrating to Boston, moving to Quincy, having a family of four, and building a life from the ground up. He left his world behind to be with the woman he loved. His family in England bid him farewell, with much of the country being destroyed by the Nazi war machine, and his experience and trauma during the war, from my accounts, led him to not just the sweet nectar that was the United States, but to his new love, where he could start anew.
In those days, and all the way up to the 2000s, the ideal American way of life seemed to be quite successful (relative to today); one person, typically the man of the house, could work a comfortable job, and easily care for his wife, children, a pet, a house, a car, etcetera – all while the innovative spirit of America continued to push it forward through the Cold War. What’s the point of fixing something that isn’t broken?*
Even up to 2007, when I was born, my Pop-pop, a member of the U.S. Air Force, was able to fully support a large family in a large house: my Nana, my uncle, my mom, my great-grandmother, and newborn me, all for a decent amount of time, were sustained by his single income. Granted, there are certain benefits and perks when it comes to being in a branch of the military(access to some of the best healthcare in the country, education access, honors from society for serving, etcetera), but the point still stands.
Today, even though the same values and concepts of America still stand, the methods and standards needed to actually succeed have become incredibly difficult to keep up with and attain.
I’ve come to notice this through my own classmates at my school. Even before we matured and started to get real ideas of what we wanted to do, the high expectations and standards that we were supposed to meet were imposed on a lot of us simply by the nature of where we live and the school we go to: Boston Latin Academy. BLA is one of the top schools in Massachusetts, and for a time, the country, and has a high reputation in the city, and Boston itself already has an incredible reputation as a home for learning, business, medicine, etcetera. These already high standards, coupled with the undying mentality of how to be successful in America, and the relatively stagnant state of our economy, I think has brewed a unique generation that struggles with a lot of things.
It feels reasonable to say that it is a lot harder to meet the quota for success today than it might’ve been even just 20 years ago. Not only have families come to rely on two incomes, rather than one, but as Gen Z enters the workforce and adulthood, the things we need to do even to just secure livelihoods for ourselves is insane. Some of my classmates take several advanced placement classes, do internships at colleges and major companies, even work at hospitals, do extracurriculars, do sports, and so much more, and it never feels like it’s enough, almost like there’s an unspoken expectation that you need to meet.
And I say all this because I feel like this way of living isn’t sustainable or good for us. Some people can never catch a break, and some people feel that they can’t take a break- like taking any amount of time off to just forget about everything and enjoy some me-time is a crime against their success or progress. The worst part is seeing the mental effects this has had on not just my peers, but my teachers. Teachers and adults are also incredibly overworked and strained, and it was almost horrifying to learn that a significant amount of teachers at BLA are on antidepressants, just to keep up with the work.
I realized myself that I couldn’t fall into this cycle almost four years ago now, when I decided to take a bus with my friends that extended my journey home quite significantly. For me, the simple joys of just being able to take those 15 minutes and talk to my friends, enjoy and appreciate life, and not worry about anything else, felt incredible – even if it might’ve been objectively detrimental to my schedule and my time, it was quite the opposite, and I took this idea of enjoying the world a little bit more every day to heart. This almost intangible but necessary feeling of taking time out of your day to just be with the people you care about, or to just slow down and love the world a little more, is something that I think needs to be acknowledged and acted upon much more.
Of course, none of this is to say that we shouldn’t give up on our dreams and aspirations or cave into the pressures of society – quite the opposite, really. I am a believer in hard work and determination. But what I do believe is detrimental to everybody is when we lose sight of what really matters, and sometimes, we are only unblinded through the harshest lessons. For some people, they realized just how valuable time was when a loved one passed away. For others, they realized that they’d spent their whole lives building up to something arbitrary and forgot about everyone who was there with them along the way. I myself am fortunate enough to have, at the very least, become conscious of the value of time at such a young age.
What I would encourage everybody to do is to take time out of their days, out of their lives, and just slow down, for a few minutes or a few hours. Know that it is definitely okay to take an entire day to relax, do the things you love, see the people you love, and enjoy life. To do simple things, like take walks and appreciate the beauty of your town or the scenery, or to enjoy time with a pet, appreciate the softness of that sweater your grandma knit you, or trek across a city to see your best friends. Even just for a moment, clear your mind, and let everything go.
We only get one life. We should use the best of it, whatever that means for everyone. But I think the most meaningful and universal notion that can be imparted on everyone is the lesson of love and friendship.
Go out and take that swimming class, or take the opportunity to grab a bite with your friend. Spend that extra moment to tell someone you love them, or to see that mural you’ve always wanted to see. Just a single moment to enjoy the world, to enjoy yourself, to enjoy the people around you, can very well mean the world itself.
Because what makes life worth living, if not to share it with the people you care for most?
*This is the idyllic scenario of the American Dream, of course; this may have been true for many, but also not for many others. Reality is quite complicated.
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