Summer days

Entry 1

Summer days are the best. The clear blue skies, green trees, and the possibility of many adventures that await are some of the great things about summer. Personally, what I love the most about summer days is the feeling of the sun on my skin and the distinct scent of clean laundry around my house. 

Even though I’m not too fond of the heat, the warm sensation of the sun piercing through my skin is a reminder that I exist in the now. During these times, I often imagine myself being a flower and absorbing all of the nutrients needed to grow.

Being able to sit outside during a nice breeze and smell the clean laundry my family put out to dry with no worries about the future, school, or homework due the next day makes summer days feel like a fever dream. Even the food on a hot summer day tastes better; it’s as if the sun and clear skies create an extra taste palette specifically for summer days. Ice cream tastes sweeter, spicy chips are more pungent, and hamburgers are more hambergurry.  

The list of the amazing things summer days bring is endless, and I could probably sit here and tell you all about them and how each one makes me feel, but then I would have to miss out on this lovely summer day. After all, summer days are the best. 

Entry 2‍

Around the age of 11, like most pre-teens, I started to become more interested in shows and movies than toys. My love for these cinematic masterpieces was much stronger than the average person’s. I would be obsessed with certain shows for months on end. One of these series was the DC universe, and naturally, my favorite hero was Batman. 

So now, years later, I have consumed most, if not all, media that is about Batman. I feel as if I know him personally, and if he was to reflect on himself, this is how it would go.  

Superhero. That’s what they called me, but I knew the truth. I was not a hero. Unlike some of these go lucky guys that wear red and blue and had the letter “s” on their chest, I wasn’t there to save anyone. I just did what was necessary. 

Unlike these “heroes” who convinced themselves that their “out-of-this-world powers” could be used for good only, I knew the truth. These powers were supposed to protect us instead of put us in danger. If we were ever to go against them, they would use their “here to save the world” powers. So just in case, I made sure to create various plans that would stop them if they ever got out of hand; because of this, they called me immoral, unsympathetic, and heartless. No, I was just prepared, and unlike them, I did not see the world through colored lenses. 

No matter how much good there was in the world, there would always be an evil side to it all. So while I was not a hero that was here to save everybody, I was a protector. Who knew that an eye for an eye doesn’t make the whole world blind, instead, it heightens the rest of our senses and makes us stronger.  

Entry 3

Mosquitos! One of the most useless animals out there. Honestly, they are just vampires who are not hot, do not have super speed, or like in Stephanie Meyer’s version, sparkle. The worst kind. At least with vampires, I could be swept up my feet by a handsome, charming guy and potentially fall in love before getting bitten, but mosquitos just bite you, and that’s it! 

Even worse, the bite doesn’t even affect you right away. Instead, it shows up a few hours later as a big red bump on your skin. Then you have to spend the next few hours trying not to scratch the bump even though your instincts tell you to. 

I am well aware of the fact that there are worse bugs out there, like flies, and there are solutions to getting rid of mosquitoes. Even so, I only have a place in my heart to hate one thing at a time, and since I currently have eight mosquito bites on me, they are today’s victims.  

So, to any mosquitoes reading this with your 100 lens eyes before I am gone from this earth, I will personally make sure that your days of terror and reign will be over. Stay vigilant; I will seek revenge!

Entry 4

“Love yourself.” It sounds so easy when it is said out loud, but to put it into practice was not. On Instagram, people promoted self-love as if it was a perfume you could purchase, giving many examples and step-by-step breakdowns on how you could learn to love yourself. 

“Make sure you meditate,” “look in the mirror and tell yourself you are beautiful,” “don’t change your appearance,” “take care of your health,” and the worst one, “exercise.” 

What a load of complete garbage. Couldn’t they understand that loving yourself was not something that could be easily solved when the whole world told you that you were not worthy! 

It must be easy for them to say such simple solutions when they were already deemed lovable — growing up as a young black girl, that was the opposite of what I felt. So used to the portrayal of women like me being the victim of hurt and betrayal made it hard to believe that I was worthy of love, even from myself. 

It wasn’t that I didn’t love myself. I believe that I love myself more than anyone else I know, except my mother of course. Instead, it was the fact that society pushed the idea that self-love was easy to find, and once you had it, it couldn’t go away. As if simple things like taking care of your health and going on runs would immediately make you accept yourself. 

While these were ways that I showed love to myself, the self-acceptance came from something much greater, and self-love isn’t always consistent. For me personally, I have gained self-love from seeing those who resemble me being in love, whether it was in the media or within my community, I was able to see different types of love, and how people showed it, this taught me two things. First, it made me realize that love was meant for everybody. Second, I understood that love, especially self-love, came with time, self-growth and was not intended to be consistent. 

That was the hard part about it all. The fact that accepting yourself took practice and wasn’t something that was set in stone. It was something you had to work on continually. There would be ups and downs in this journey, but in the end, it would be worth it all, not only for you but those around you. Through loving yourself, you can create a place that allows others to do the same. So let’s stop taking advice from Instagram and instead give ourselves the time and space to accept ourselves without any judgment.