Quarantine has given me space to reflect

1.‍

Dear Diary,

Since school ended, some of the things that I miss the most are my school activities like playing baseball and drumming in class. The beginning of this summer felt weird and awkward because I didn’t feel the emotions of school being over, and I didn’t feel like it was going to be a good summer. At the beginning of quarantine I thought it was a good thing, but after the first few months started to pass by I felt like I was going to be stuck at home forever. One of the most noticeable differences in me was that I thought that I was a bother for my family because of the time that I’ve been home. When this racial justice movement exploded in May, it was really powerful because it was the first time in years where not only one race was supporting the other. It also made me believe that we still have hope to change all of this racist BS that has been happening for years. At some point of this quarantine it made me realize how careless humans are, and that everything that has been happening is a chance for us to open our minds and realize that we can do better.

2.

Dear Diary,

Today I woke up thinking about the littlest things that I accomplished at such a young age. Who would’ve thought that a kid from the Dominican Republic would come to the United States at the age of 12 and overcome many challenges. Sometimes I ask myself why I’m doing what I’m doing, and my answer is because I have people that depend on me. I have to be the role model for both of my little brothers and cousins and make them proud of who I have become. Getting used to living in a place where you barely know your own father was tough because I grew up without knowing him. As time passed by I started to like it here, and that was because of the friends I made and the love they showed to me. Nowadays it is different than when I first came because I know my way around, and things are way better than before. But that doesn’t change the fact that I still have to remember where I come from and to keep fighting until I accomplish all of my goals. 

‍

3.

Dear Diary,

Before COVID-19 I was looking forward to visiting my mom in Panama, but unfortunately I couldn’t go because of the virus. It has been around 4 months since quarantine started and I still haven’t got the chance to go visit her. I feel like everything that has been happening is giving us a lesson on how to be a better person with ourselves. During the past few months I have been thinking a lot about how different this year would be if all of this had not happened. I feel like with all of this time stuck at home, I had the time to think about things and become a better person with myself and to others. I know it has been some rough times for people, and for me, but I have used all of this time to my advantage.