Life, at the moment

Life, at the moment
is all, but well.
So many hardships,
so many secrets I cannot tell.
So many wonders,
gone in the blink of an eye!
So many nights
where I laid down and cried…
So many ups,
with more downs.
So many things
I’ve lost instead of found.
Life, at the moment
is somewhat dreadful,
or maybe I’m just living with my head-full.
There have been times
I hurt those I loved the most,
times I stole
from those who had less than I,
times I abused,
times I was used,
times I manipulated,
times they demonstrated,
room for improvement
that lead to self-destruction,
and the brutal punishments
I gave myself…

Life, at the moment
is a haunting thing,
filled with ghosts of the past
and cheerful,
yet gloomy spirits of the future.
Constantly screaming about
what could have been,
while reminding me of what could be.
Forever trapped between
this exhausting battle;
past vs. future
where present struggles to be heard
over cries of pain
and screams of agony.

In the end,
life, at the moment
is not where I wish to be.
There is too much pain
from that awful past,
and too much pressure
for an unknown future.
There is too much commotion,
so many wars,
so much bloodshed.
The cries!
The screams!
All of this caused by a human being,
who didn’t even ask to be born…

Life, at the moment
is what I made of it…
no one ever said life would be easy,
but I thought it’d be somewhat pleasant…
Regardless,
life is life.
You live,
just to die.
You grow and you hurt,
your experience and you learn,
you love…
and you lose…
Just to die.

Life, at the moment
is just that;
it’s simply my life at the moment.
There’s nothing else to it.