“No one likes you. You’re really annoying” says a boy, an age older than me. My eyes begin to water; the colors inside the bus begin to blur into each other. “I- I-I” are the only words I can find, since I was told not to call people bad names. Then, like always, the tears come out. “You’re also a butt,” continued the 3rd grader. “And—.” “Stop,” says a high-pitched yet certain voice. “You’re being mean to him!” A small hand has my shoulder. A girl with hazel-brown hair and a cute chubby face fixates herself in front of my eyes, trying to make sure she is not a blur in my watered eyes. “Are you okay?” My eyes begin to water by the innocent care held in her voice. I turn away from her and say “mmm hmm,” as I look out the bus window, trying to stop and dry the tears before I see my mom at the bus stop. However, the tears still keep forming in my eye from a mixture of two feelings: gratefulness and disappointment. I was grateful that my little sister had defended me, but disappointed that my little sister defended me.
When You- 2019
“Oh shoot!” I say in my head after finishing my English assignment. I immediately scoot back and get out of my chair. I leave my room and speed walk to my sister’s room that’s right next to mine. I open her door swiftly, yet with care as to not break it. My sister hears the wind of her opened door and looks back. Her face, which once held baby fat, was more matured and almost a copy of my mother’s face. She turns back to face her desk, moving her hazel-brown hair to rest on her chair. I move towards her to see math problems reading, “Find Y” and “Find X”. “Whatcha doin, Sophia?” I ask her with a relaxed and laid back tone. She replies with a quick, uninterested response, “Homework.” “Woooah!” I exclaim with exaggeration as I try to pat her head. “Can you leave?” she asks with annoyance. “Hey, I didn’t mean to-“ “Just leave! Gosh! Sometimes I wish I had a brother who could help me with my homework because a lot of the time it’s pretty hard.” I stop for a second to think of all the things I wanted to be for Sophia: intelligent, an excellent role model, and someone to be proud of. Instead she was stuck with a brother who was of no special intelligence, no model of excellence, and a bringer of embarrassment. I walk towards the door in silence and quietly close it all the way as I leave, while leaving the memory of what happened in her room half opened.
“I’m going to show you a picture from your birthday.” my dad says with pride in the back of his voice, while he puts away the gift I gave him yesterday for Father’s Day. He takes out his phone and goes to the pictures he has taken. He scrolls to a picture taken outside our house and it has my friends on my right side and Sophia at my left side. “What does this mean to you?” my dad asks with a smile on his face. He’s pointing to my sister who is holding my shoulder. I shrug and say, “I don’t know.” He then responds with an answer I never would’ve guessed, “Sophia’s dependent on you, you’re her rock, you give her balance.” I hold myself from giving him a confused look since he seems certain of his idea. “Yeah.. I guess…” is the only response I can give him instead of the half opened memory of the words “I wish I had a brother.”
Me Twice- 2020
The smell of pork, rice, beans, and tomato salad has died down from the table since we licked our plates clean of them. My mom, dad, sister, and two grandmas are smiling in satisfaction from their full stomachs and of the joy anyone gets when celebrating New Years Eve with those you love. Their smiles look like gold to me as the lightbulb above us gives off a dark yellow light. “Now, it’s time to say who we’re most grateful for and why” my dad announced to everyone at the table.The task given to me was not one I had to think hard about since I would say I was grateful to my mom for putting food on the table. Everyone at the table shared who they were grateful for except for Sophia and I. I sat at the table uninterested since I expected my sister to have the same answer as me. “I’m grateful for Daniel because he’s my best friend!” I sit up in my chair and look at my sister. I wanted to ask her, “Why am I your best friend? What good did I do to you? What would make you say that?” However, her eyes and smile are bright and filled with honesty that I temporarily forget the questions in such a beautiful moment. “And you, Daniel? Who are you grateful for?” my dad asks. I think of my sister, of all the times we cried of joy and sadness, the times we were both scared and courageous, and the time on the bus where she defended me. I look at my little sister, her hazel-brown hair unchanged by the lighting, and also say, “I am grateful for Sophia because she is my best friend.”